I normally don't talk about disagreements on here, I keep this an uplifting blog, but if I am going to write to you all about my life and about my marriage and give personal advice, then I also need to honest on the hard stuff to. As many have read on here by now, I am a christian, and I whole heartedly strive to do everything that honors God. One thing that I take very seriously in that aspect is my marriage needs to also be striving to serve God and make sure there is room for Him to be the center of our marriage.
Last night there was a disagreement, nothing crazy, but it was a disagreement and rather than going to bed, going on opposite sides or one of us leaving the room, we talked it out, and I mean all of it out. We worked it all out till 1 a.m. Is that crazy? No. Why not wait till the morning? Because when you go to bed with that on your head and seeping into your heart you cause a wall to begin it's building. Then you get up in the morning both extremely angry that you didn't get a peaceful night's sleep and you go about your morning with that anger on your heart so another brick get's added, by the time the conversation is able to happen the bricks have reached a new high.
One thing that my husband and I were told when we got married was to "Always pray every morning and every night together" by his Aunt (shout out aunt marbeth) and so when we got married and got settled in our apartment on 4 chalkboards we wrote our rules to marriage to hang above our bed to keep as a reminder and that was one of them. Below is a list of all of them. You see I don't think its coincidence that in the Bible it is stated "Where TWO or more are gathered I am there." In a marriage there is 2 people. When a couple prays in agreeance there is power and meaning there.
I've had the question posed to me multiple times "Is it really important to get married to someone who is equally yoked?" My answer "Absolutley" and I know some people say 'Well they could get saved from living with me and seeing me and how God is blessing me.' My answer is this, if that is the case from dating you, getting to know you, growing a friendship with you, if they haven't seen God and how amazing He is and accepted the Lord then most likely they aren't going to or at least they won't because of watching you. When you marry someone who doesn't carry the faith you have, who doesn't believe in the power of prayer your losing the reason to marriage. Marriage is a promise you make to serve God all the days of your life, its a merging of not just two people but two callings to coincide together. When things get tough and your praying for ultimate healing or for God's hand in a situation you need your spouse to be able to come along side you in agreeance and pray with you. You don't want someone looking at you and saying "Why are you praying? There is no God" or "Keep your God to yourself."
I've listened to couples who are married, who are simply dating, who are living together and one being a christian and one not, and its very alarming to watch. Your spouse is to keep you accountable, if your spouse doesn't hold to your faith, to your standards of living, to your beliefs then already your spouse has failed one of their greater tasks.
I could go on typing about this forever but I know by now I probably some readers, but if your still reading know this is something I pray about consistently and if your a prayer warrior I ask you pray it to. Marriage is a sacred thing and lately marriage has been thrown down in the mud and it's meaning has been devalued. Let's pray that God intercedes in these marriages and we see a fruitful tree of marriage again instead of a dry cracked dessert of unbelievers.
Btw: The five rules we live by
- Never go to bed angry
- Always pray morning and night together
- Never yell at each other unless there is a fire
- Sometimes marriage is a give and take
- Always kiss me goodnight and good morning
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